Sakuya’s Spring Cleaning Review – A Fine Dusting in the Midst of Danmaku

Hello, and welcome to another assessment of a game that proves it’s not digital dreck that would clog the industry’s arteries. Today, I turn my eyes toward Sakuya’s Spring Cleaning, a title that, much like a live-service roadmap, promises a sparkling facade where you scrub the stains off a floor you want to stand on again. It is a work that releases itself from a peculiar, modern state of purgatory: a technically functional game, yet explores a revolutionary spark that makes one yearn for the days when innovation wasn’t just a buzzword thrown around by executives in tailored suits who wouldn’t know a compelling gameplay loop would make them insert microtransactions. So, let’s roll up our sleeves and see if there’s actually any substance beneath the suds, or if we’re just being sold another bucket of overpriced, flavored water.

Gameplay

You play as Sakuya Izayoi, the head maid of the Scarlet Devil Mansion, who apparently didn’t get the memo that spring cleaning usually involves a vacuum and some Windex, not jumping over glowing balls of death while flying through a library. The goal is to clean up dust clumps, though the controls feel like you’re trying to maneuver a shopping cart with one locked wheel through a field of landmines and danmaku.

When you push the B button, you have a Broom Move which slows you down so you can see your hitbox. I’ve got one question to ask: why a small hitbox in a platformer? It’s like trying to thread a needle while riding a unicycle on a tightrope. Don’t even get me started on the portals – you hop into a portal thinking you’re making progress, but sometimes you’ll pop out the other side directly into a bullet’s path. It’s a teleport-and-die mechanic. I’ve seen more fairness in a rigged carnival game run by a guy who would name themselves “Sticky.”

Since we’re playing a Touhou Project fangame, the screen will constantly fill with danmaku, which is normal and can make the game difficult. When there are so many, your thumbs will get tired trying to evade them all. You can use a bomb to clear the screen, but it costs you your time bonus. It’s a choice between dying now and getting a crappy score later. If you get a game over, you can just continue right where you left off and none of the dust piles you removed respawn. It’s better than me shoving one of Sakuya’s daggers down my throat and drinking some expired soy milk than trying to precision-jump over spikes while a tanky fairy shoots a wall of neon Cheerios at my face.

Graphics

The game’s art style is like a fever dream from 1996. It has that chunky, pixelated look that makes me feel like I should be blowing into a cartridge before I play. The spell card art is apparently by someone named Alphes, and while the developer says they’re just placeholders, they actually look great, unlike the rest of the graphics.

In the actual gameplay, the pixel art looks good, and the graphics don’t look like a handful of moving Lego bricks. The danmaku may be a mess of neon circles and orange arrows that may blend into the background, making it hard to see the bullet that will end your life. What if there’s a lot on-screen? It will feel like trying to play Where’s Waldo while someone is throwing Skittles at your eyes.

Some players in the comments are saying the art is cute and charming. That may disappear when you’re too busy squinting at the screen trying to find the danmaku that may be hard to see. They’re so small that they might as well be microscopic bacteria. Why would you make the danmaku invisible in some cases? It’s like a game of dodgeball where the balls are made of glass and the floor is covered in mirrors.

The bird portals appear to be random. You’re in the Scarlet Devil Mansion’s library, and why is there a magical bird waiting to spit you into a bed of spikes? It’s confusing, chaotic, and enough to make a sane person want to jump into a portal that leads directly into a dumpster fire.

Audio

If you like the sound of a synthesized orchestra being put through a paper shredder, you’re in for a real treat. The soundtrack consists of covers of Touhou Project music, but they’ve been arranged to be more frantic than a squirrel on a double espresso.

The music is energetic and fun, unlike tracks that are psychological warfare designed to break your spirit before the boss even shows up. I wish there were more songs because after ten minutes of hearing that high-pitched, chirpy melody while dying for the fiftieth time, it starts to feel like someone is drilling a hole directly into your frontal lobe.

Every time you clean a dust clump, you get a little ping that sounds like a microwave telling you your frozen burrito is done. And when you get hit, you hear a hollow, soul-crushing thud that reminds you that you’ve lost another shield or life in a game that clearly wants you to suffer. It’s like the game is mocking you with every note. Better compositions are coming from a broken radiator in the middle of February.

Bad Qualities

If trying to evade all of that danmaku would give you a headache, there is a laundry list of things that will make you want to toss your monitor out a window. This game is still in beta, and I hope the flaws below get addressed in future versions.

Those Yukari portals can be a complete disaster if you’re so close to clearing a stage. You hop in one and bam – you’re spat out directly into a bullet’s path with zero time to react. It’s not a challenge; it’s a blindfolded stroll through a minefield.

Some of the danmaku are so small you need a microscope to see them, unless you’re playing the game on a really big monitor. Why would you make the things that kill you harder to see than the background? It’s like trying to play dodgeball with contact lenses made of sandpaper.

Anything involving the color orange will blend into the background like they’re trying to win a game of hide and seek. I’m sorry, but if I can’t see what’s killing me, that doesn’t just inflate the difficulty, but is also a poor game design choice.

If you jump and try to start sweeping in mid-air, the game just looks at you and laughs. Sakuya won’t start sweeping until you land, leaving you standing there like a moron while a tanky fairy turns you into Swiss cheese.

I wish there were more music, because after ten minutes of listening to the same song over and over and dying on the same stage, the melody will start to feel like a psychological experiment designed to see how long it takes for a human brain to liquefy.

During the final boss fight, there’s no indication that you’re actually cleaning the cobwebs. You’re just sweeping away in the dark, hoping you’re making progress while the Angel of Asthma rains neon death on your head.

My Verdict

So, what’s the final tally on this maid-driven madness? Sakuya’s Spring Cleaning is a bizarre little experiment that somehow manages to be both incredibly amazing and absolutely infuriating at the same time. It’s got that classic indie heart that gives it an 8 out of 10. You can tell the developer put a lot of work into the game, graphics, music, and overall vibe, even if the high difficulty makes it like trying to eat a delicious cake that’s been filled with thumbtacks.

The platforming is a unique twist on the Touhou Project formula, and when it works, it’s actually pretty satisfying to weave through a wall of neon while scrubbing the floor. But those teleport-and-die portals and danmaku make me want to play a safer game. It’s a game that demands perfection but doesn’t always give you the tools to achieve it fairly.

If you’d like to try the game for yourself, I have the link here:
https://jpanboi69.itch.io/sakuyas-spring-cleaning-beta